Skip to content

December 30, 2014

Diary of a somewhat Employed educated 26 year old
I’m not done yet… Don’t count me out !
Give me a moment to breathe find some momentary lull ,silence, peace, and contentment. It has been a hectic, educational and eye opening year.
Small droplets on a large rock ;eventually make a big hole… Brazilian proverb
If you would have asked me a year ago what have I been up too ? My response would be; I’m talking life as it comes and coping . Please don’t ask me if I have a job yet because I will cry about everything that’s wrong in my life , including feeling like such a failure because at my age because half the goals I set out to achieve are not reached… Need I mention I’ve been feeling self pity for a while now and its starting to affect my relationships . So leave me alone the only person I need to answer to is myself and God…

What a difference a year makes… Right now if you asked me the same question,that’s if you dare… I’d tell you;I’m a BA ,I know it doesn’t sound like a proper job title … But at least it’s a job and I’m thankful, I’ve been looking for 3 years and finally after been told, I’m either inconsistent, not qualified or not experienced and no you are not what we are looking for so many times .I wasn’t expecting to land any gig let alone a campaign that would be the start of many more gigs to come. I wrote in an earlier blog post this year that I heard no 3 times ,from the company I’m somewhat employed at today but because I never back down and I take risks I went back again.
I have a habit call it a trait if you will. I never never give up ,I always fight and I come back much more stronger, even when you think I’ve thrown in the towel , I’d be finding creative ways to find a way . I’ve learned a lot this year with regards to work and knowing your worth. Don’t ever underestimate your potential and be thankful, cause it might seem like you’ve been trying your hardest,but there seems to be no progress but you’ll get there .

Dear heart stop falling for people you can’t have…
No matter how many times I said this this year ; I ended up falling for both people I can have and can’t have. Even though some of them will never know . Yes you nameless and amazing who made my heart do instant somersaults only for a minuet , oh an how can I forget Dr Cuttie Pie t who I can’t wait to see again next year, those dreamy dark blues turn my insides into jelly … And that smile of his that just makes me feel better am due for a check up …
Benjamin,Ben…you fine specimen of man. To the only guy who was ever able to keep up with my spontaneous thinking ,sarcasm and jokes. I’m going to so miss him , I don’t think his ever going to see my post so its safe to say his name.
Oh and my heart got bruised and by bruised. I genuinely liked the guy ,but again he wasn’t patient enough again . By again I mean that its happened before . I can’t believe I let it happen again . When I had a serious talk with an 80 year old octogenarian he told me I shouldn’t just settle , some men are fools but he told me I’m smart enough to make the right decisions when it comes to matters of the heart . He picked up that both my head and heart have to agree with each other when falling in love .
So when it comes to love this year I learned; never to settle,
always go back to your journal when you can’t remember why you stopped talking to someone (you won’t feel like a fool again for opening the lines of communication and allowing ) Be a slave to your heart and follow it no matter what.
Put yourself first and love you.

The previous post I put up, I was all morbid and talking about stones and the hospital… It was confirmed a couple of weeks back that I have cyst in one of my glands ,they could affect muscle mobility on my face if not monitored properly . I was also lucky that they weren’t cancerous .
I’m thankful for many things in my life ,for the fact that I can wake up and smile and talk, for my friends , family (sometimes) ,special people who read my work and most of all I’m thankful for the life I’ve been given …

I’m not done yet …

Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.


From → Uncategorized

Leave a Comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: